Intimacy in Addiction Recovery

True intimacy is important if you want authentic relationships.  I honestly don’t have too many intimate relationships right now but I am working on it. Barriers to intimacy are feelings of jealousy, pride, anger, shame, and fear and lack of trust in others. It’s important to have trust and transparency in relationships.  Being truly intimate with someone means talking boldly and honestly, whether good or bad. In the past, my pride made it difficult for me to receive constructive feedback without taking offense. I’m realizing now that constructive criticism from true friends is not meant to hurt me, rather it’s meant to help me grow and improve myself.

Unfortunately, I’ve been a surface person most of my life, never going very deep in my relationships. I used to feel that it was easier to have relationships without intimacy. However, every surface relationship ended shortly after it began, as I became easily bored and disinterested. I know that if I truly become intimate with another person, there’s the huge risk that I could be abandoned and hurt which is terrifying to me. But, in the long run, the potential benefits of a truly intimate relationship far outweigh the risk in that I would gain more long-lasting friendships that help me grow into the authentic man I aspire to be. In order for me to become more intimate, I need to break my habit of superficiality and start being courageous in sharing my true feelings.