Managing My Emotions

All my life I let my emotions get the best of me and take over my whole mind-set. From when I was young child and I felt my first feelings of abandonment, rejection, depression and sadness, I often blamed myself even when the fault was someone else’s. I felt lost as a child because it seemed like “normal kids” could brush off negative emotions while I felt like it destroyed me, often leading me to not want to leave my house. When I felt embarrassment it was like a stabbing pain in my back. As I grew older, each day got harder and harder and the only way I learned to cope was by getting loaded. My emotional states and the drugs drove me to violence, getting arrested, suicide attempts, you name it because my emotions ran the show.

Fast forward to my 20’s when I finally checked into detox to get sober. I’m not going to lie, my first year of sobriety was still very difficult as I struggled with managing my emotions sober. But once I learned to process my feelings in a mature manner, I got past the rough outer layer and dug into my underlying issues. I had unhealthy resentments towards myself and my family . However, since my family therapy session, I let go of my resentments and my relationship with my family has been better than I ever could have imagined. I’m not perfect by any means but my life is 100% different today since I’ve learned to manage my emotions in a healthy manner.